Posthumous message services: how they work and how to choose one

What a posthumous message service does

You write, record or film a message now. The service holds it. After you have died, it delivers the message to the person you chose, by email, text, phone call or a private link. Some services also send messages on set days, such as a birthday or a wedding, for years afterward.

The three ways a service decides you have died

This is the most important difference between services, and the one people think about least.

1. A check-in that expires (a "dead man's switch"). The service emails or pings you every so often. If you stop answering for long enough, it assumes the worst and sends. It is simple, but a lost password, a long trip or a hospital stay can send private messages by mistake. More on that here.
2. A trusted person who tells the service. You name one or two people. When you die, they report it. This is the safest of the three for avoiding false alarms, because a real person who knows you has to act. It depends on that person remembering and being reachable.
3. A date you choose. The message is locked until a day you picked. This is about timing, not about death, so it is usually combined with one of the other two.

Questions to ask before you pay

• Who can start a release, and what stops a mistake? Look for a second person to confirm, and a waiting period when you can say "I am here."
• Is it one payment or a subscription? A subscription that lapses can leave your messages undelivered, so find out what happens if payments stop.
• What happens to the company? A message that has to arrive in twenty years needs a service that will still be there. Ask how it is run and what happens if it closes.
• How is it delivered? Email can be lost in a spam folder. A phone call or a text is harder to miss. Some people want to hear your voice, and some want to read your words.
• Who can see what you wrote? Ask whether anyone at the company reads your messages, and how long they are kept.
• Can your people say no? A message that rings someone's phone on a hard day should be something they agreed to receive.

How Still Hello answers those questions

Still Hello delivers your messages by phone call, in your own words, on the days you chose. You pay once, with no subscription. Nothing is ever sent while you are alive. When you have died, one of the keepers you named reports it, and a second keeper confirms. You and your keepers then get 48 hours to say it is a mistake, and only if no one does are your messages released. No one at Still Hello reviews them first. The people you chose get one text asking if they would like to hear from you, and only those who say yes are called.

That is one honest way to do it, not the only way. Read the questions above, compare what each service says, and pick the one that fits the people you are writing to.